Happy Saturday to all of you beautiful people out there!
Today is going to be an awesome day! I went to bed and woke up with the gnarliest headache in the history of headaches but it has finally gone away! I think that was long overdue after all the crying and stressing I have been doing. Glad that's over with! I have full intentions of spending my last weekend with real boobs in style. By that I mean I am going with friends to a local Mexican restaurant where you get tequila shots every time the train goes by. Pray for trains! Then we will be continuing our fiesta through the night! This is going to be fun!
Quick update: Jillian is home now! She got through surgery just fine! Thanks for all the prayers and good vibes sent her way! When I asked her how she felt this morning she said 'like an elephant is sitting on my chest.' Well, that sounds fun. Not. Luckily, she is one of the strongest women I know, so she is sailing through this like a champ! Continue to send your thoughts and prayers her way. Love you, Jill!
Awesome present of the day: These ice packs! I mean, who doesn't need animal print, rubber ducky, and monkey ice packs?? I know, you're jealous. On a serious note, I have a friend who can never eat peas again because she used them as ice packs on her chest and they are now ruined for her forever. Don't ruin peas for yourself! Go to TJ Maxx and get super cool ones like this! I have been told there will be lots of icing involved, so buying two sets that you can rotate is probably a good idea!
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My sister is so awesome that she thinks of things I would have never imagined needing, like this bad boy! It's a sleep mask, duh. Sleepover parties at the hospital are never fun, but not actually sleeping makes it ten times worse! The nurses are always coming in, taking blood, asking if you're okay, and I swear it seems like there's always a light on! Well, I can't press mute on the hospital sounds, but at least now I will be able to sleep!! If you are beginning this journey I suggest one of these, as I am sure I will be getting tons of use out of it in the coming weeks!
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One of the things I find most interesting about writing this blog is that people say they are 'so sorry' for what I am going through...
I do not want anyone to be sorry!!! There's nothing to be sorry for! If anything, you should be saying congratulations! Congratulations...? For what? WE HAVE FOUND A WAY TO BEAT CANCER BEFORE IT EVEN BEGINS TO FIGHT, Y'ALL. I don't have cancer and that's something to celebrate in the first place, but the fact I am not even giving that jerk a chance... definitely no reason to be sorry.
Yes, this process is scary and boy do my emotions get the best of me, but I want to emphasize to everyone that this is an amazing opportunity I have! Don't worry, I have to remind myself of that too when I get scared, nervous, anxious, or whatever, but the end result will be a happy, healthy, and long life. Hey, I am trying to make a difference in the world and that takes times...
Here is a little motivation for all your fella's out there who need to go get tested:
This is my cousin, Keven! He is obviously very happy about that giant firework and also happens to be BRCA 2 positive. He is an awesome dude with crazy drumming skills who knows that knowledge is power, so he got tested! Now, go be as cool (well try to be) as my cuzzo and get tested for the BRCA gene mutation. It's not just a girl thing...
My song of the day is Rebelution--Bright side of life. This song has such a positive message and I feel like the boys of Reb are singing to me when it comes on my iPod! Some of the most powerful lyrics say 'I dont want to scare you, no I don't, It's time you be a role model, so, open up! It also reminds me to 'rise up and make an impact' and 'look on the bright side of life.'
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You know the drill! Download or at least listen to this bad boy! Reggae always has such a positive message, I don't know how you could possibly not like it!
Have a great Saturday, y'all! See you tomorrow!
xxoo
ReplyDeletecontinue your fight my dear you are awesome. xxoo
ReplyDeleteI agree, men need to get tested too, especially fathers! The surveys for assessing risk always ask for a close relative like a sister or mother having breast cancer, but what if the father is the carrier like my grandfather was? My mom had no idea. My grandfather never had cancer yet he was the PALB2 carrier and his sisters were both over 50 when they had breast cancer (also not an increased risk factor for a younger relative).
ReplyDeleteBy the way, I LOVE those ice packs! When I am ready to go through with the surgery and make that final decision, I am sending my husband out to find those bad boys!
I have a few questions if you are okay answering and sorry if you have already answered them: 1) Have you decided to do implants? If so, what kind and why? 2) What were the reasons why your doctor is doing your surgeries and reconstruction in the phased approach (I've heard different answers on this so I'm just curious), 3) Have you decided to do a nipple sparing surgery or tattoos? What about your cousin (if she says it is okay to say)? Why or why not have you decided to do this? Has your surgeons suggested an improvement on keeping nerves intact during all this?
I'm glad for you that your family can be so close during this and such an awesome support. You are blessed to have that and I love reading that you recognize and appreciate that fact. None of this is easy...even if you seem like such a confident and strong person to so many...it still is scary and isn't ideal. But when I am debating it all, I often think of all those veterans returning from Iraq and Afghanistan with missing limbs, or the Boston marathon victims who choose to remove a body part because it just isn't working for them anymore due to their injuries, and I think, "Hell yes...there is my strength. Those are similar shoes to mine. I can do this and be okay living with my choice." I hope my kids will understand that during those 12+ weeks of my not being able to pick them up or hug them.
Sarah, your strength gives me strength! Thank you for sharing your story! To answer your questions: Yes, I am getting implants! I will be getting gel silicone because they are the more natural feeling vs. saline and my doctor highly recommended them. 2) They told me they are doing the phased approach to stretch my skin because once they remove all the tissues and cells they are starting from nothing! And they didn't give me another option, haha 3) Have you decided to do a nipple sparing surgery or tattoos? I am doing nipple-sparing, which is what people recommend. They say that it makes you feel like they are your own boobs because you still have that part left. I decided to keep mine for that reason, so I can still feel like at least some part of my breast is still mine. It's a confidence and self image thing for me! My surgeons have told me that I may have some sensation but most likely I won't have any type of sensitivity left. I have read testimonials that people do manage to have some feeling left after though, so there is hope! I hope this helps you! Stay strong, Sarah, you can do this!
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